I am resolved now. There shall be no place for love in my life. Never again. The so little part left of my heart by its preceeding owners must only go to pure friendship. For I know I am only to be deceived by love as common people sees it. I am aware of how nonsense I talk. But what would life be without nonsensical ideas? The mere thought of going through it this way makes me wanna die. There is nothing serious about life, apart from life itself. You can never guess where you will find yourself to be inclined to. I happened to think I would crave all my life for the glimpse of the highest feeling that could ever be felt. Now I just feel as resting. Resting and walking through my golden days with wide open eyes.
I do not know when I am going to write here again. Or if I only will do so. As I am leaving the only part of the whole world I had ever really know, I might need some time to see what I never saw.